13 Integral Yoga
13 The Mother
3 Agenda Vol 02
2 Agenda Vol 01
|1958-08-30, #Agenda Vol 01, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
It was just at four oclock in the morning, and it woke me up. It was exactly like this I was apparently in my bathroom, and I had to open the door between the bathroom and Sri Aurobindos room; the moment I put my hand on the doorknob, I knew with an absolute certainty that destruction was awaiting me behind the door. It had the form or image of those great invaders of India, those who had swooped down upon India and destroyed everything in their wake But it was only an impression.
|1958_12_-_Floor_1,_young_girl,_we_shall_kill_the_young_princess_-_black_tent, #Agenda Vol 01, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
Two or three days after I retired to my room upstairs,1 early in the night I fell into a very heavy sleep and found myself out of the body much more materially than I do usually. This degree of density in which you can see the material surroundings exactly as they are. The part that was out seemed to be under a spell and only half conscious. When I found myself at the first floor where everything was absolutely black, I wanted to go up again, but then I discovered that my hand was held by a young girl whom I could not see in the darkness but whose contact was very familiar. She pulled me by the hand telling me laughingly, No, come, come down with me, we shall kill the young princess. I could not understand what she meant by this young princess and, rather unwillingly, I followed her to see what it was. Arriving in the anteroom which is at the top of the staircase leading to the ground floor, my attention was drawn in the midst of all this total obscurity to the white figure of Kamala2 standing in the middle of the passage between the hall and Sri Aurobindos room. She was as it were in full light while everything else was black. Then I saw on her face such an expression of intense anxiety that to comfort her I said, I am coming back. The sound of my voice shook off from me the semi-trance in which I was before and suddenly I thought, Where am I going? and I pushed away from me the dark figure who was pulling me and in whom, while she was running down the steps, I recognized a young girl who lived with Sri Aurobindo and me for many years and died five years back. This girl during her life was under the most diabolical influence. And then I saw very distinctly (as through the walls of the staircase) down below a small black tent which could scarcely be perceived in the surrounding darkness and standing in the middle of the tent the figure of a man, head and face shaved (like the sannyasin or the Buddhist monks) covered from head to foot with a knitted outfit following tightly the form of his body which was tall and slim. No other cloth or garment could give an indication as to who he could be. He was standing in front of a black pot placed on a dark red fire which was throwing its reddish glow on him. He had his right arm stretched over the pot, holding between two fingers a thin gold chain which looked like one of mine and was unnaturally visible and bright. Shaking gently the chain he was chanting some words which translated in my mind, She must die the young princess, she must pay for all she has done, she must die the young princess.
|1961-03-17, #Agenda Vol 02, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
To wind it all up, I went to Sri Aurobindos rooman enormous, enormous room, but in the same state. And he appeared to be in an eternal consciousness, entirely detached from everything yet very clearly aware of our total incapacity.
Then I arrived at Sri Aurobindos room with my plates. Oh, said Sri Aurobindo, it has taken so long that I will take my bath first. I looked at my poor breakfast and thought, Well, I went to so much trouble to make it hot and now its going to get cold! All this was so sordid, so sad.
|1961-06-20, #Agenda Vol 02, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
Yesterday, when I was in that immobility, suddenly I felt something obliging me to turn my head. I didnt turn my head, but the consciousness turned (gesture to the left), and then I saw myself standing there in the corridor (that kind of corridor separating the hall and Sri Aurobindos room) in my usual outdoor dress [Indian shirt and light trousers]. I was standing up very straight and holding a globe of light above my head and such a light! It was shining brighter than those strong electric bulbsdazzling. My own clothing seemed to be made of golden-pink light. I was standing very straight and carrying this globe (gesture above the head). When I saw that I said to myself, Now why on earth is he making me see this? And that was all. Nothing else happened except that. But near me there was a figure I didnt know, and it reminded me of Xs great guru,1 whom I had already seen once. There he was by my side, a tall figure, and he seemed to be the one who had tugged at me to make me see that vision.
|1961-08-02, #Agenda Vol 02, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
Then I went into Sri Aurobindos room and told him, Heres what I have seen. Yes, I know! he replied (Mother laughs) Thats fine; I have decided to retire to my room, and you will take charge of the people. You take charge. (There were about thirty people at the time.) Then he called everyone together for one last meeting. He sat down, had me sit next to him, and said, I called you here to tell you that, as of today, I am withdrawing for purposes of sadhana, and Mother will now take charge of everyone; you should address yourselves to her; she will represent me and she will do all the work. (He hadnt mentioned this to me!Mother bursts into laughter)
|1962-08-18, #Agenda Vol 03, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
Ive asked no one, Ive told no one, I havent said anything about it, not a word; youre the first. When Pavitra came yesterday I smilingly asked him if hed had a good meditation, thats all. He said yes. So I told him, Well, Sri Aurobindo was sitting on you! (Mother laughs) I was sitting below, in Sri Aurobindos room, he replied. He was there too! I said (Mother laughs).
|1963-12-03, #Agenda Vol 04, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
I had another interesting example, with a visitor: a German industrial magnate, it seems. I had seen his photo and found there was something in him I had him come. He entered the room and came in front of me: he didnt know what to do (no one had told him anything). So I looked at him and put some force (Mother slowly lowers her hand), a little, progressively. And all at once (at first he was quite official, it was MISTER So-and-so who was there), all at once his left hand began to rise, like this (gesture of a hand clenched as in trance), all the rest was absolutely still. When I saw that, I smiled and withdrew the force, then let him go. It seems he went downstairs, went into Sri Aurobindos room and started weeping. Afterwards, the next day, he wrote to me and told me in German English that I had been too human: Why have you been too human? He wanted his being to be DESTROYED in order to be born again to the true life.
|1964-11-25, #Agenda Vol 05, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
No, in Sri Aurobindos roomin his corridor.
|1965-10-16, #Agenda Vol 06, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
If he was brought up in a Christian way, its the photo where he is young which is good, they instantly see in it the face of Christ I All of them. The day before yesterday again, an American painter, who is here and has read Sri Aurobindos books, wanted to do a portrait of Sri Aurobindo (he never saw him) from photosits just as it was with the bust in Sri Aurobindos room!1 They all make a mystic Sri Aurobindo with narrow temples, like that (gesture tapering upward), a long mystic face, because they cant get out of their Christianity! For them, of course, the Power, anything that expresses the Power, oh! (gesture of repulsion)
|1967-08-16, #Agenda Vol 08, #The Mother, #Integral Yoga|
No, in Sri Aurobindos room.