object:Big Mind (non-dual) --- Non-Dual and Transcendent Voices --- The Way
FACILITATOR: May I speak now to the Way? (When you shift your posture, I recommend that you sit upright.)
THE WAY: I am the Way.
FACILITATOR: Tell me, what does that mean? What is that like, to be the Way? (I suggest that you just sit with this for a moment, after you acknowledge "I am the
Way.")
THE WAY: As the Way, I feel that I have arrived. I am what he has been seeking all his life, and maybe he didn't even know it. There is no place to go, there is nothing to do, there is nothing to seek after, there is nothing to desire. I am just completely here, present, and awake. I am presence. I am the Way, the Truth, the Light. I'm it. I am! I know it sounds a little bit arrogant, but there's no self or ego involved.
I am the Way, that which was before the birth of the self, or the origin of the self. I am the source. I have no boundaries, absolutely no limits. I am beyond both space and time. I am the sun, the moon, the blue sky, the white clouds, the palm trees, the flowers, the birds. There is nothing that is not me. There is no separation or distinction, I am just pure love, unconditional being. I am being itself. I'm not becoming.
There is no way to get to me other than just to be me. It's not about arrival, coming, or going. I am unborn and undying. I am colorless and yet I manifest as every color. I am formless and yet every form is no other than me.
Humans are seeking me, but their very seeking prevents them from being me or discovering me, because they are me. Even their very seeking is me. I manifest as all things including their very seeking. However, they can't find me while they are seeking because they are in that seeking mode, and I am non-seeking. In fact, that's another name for me, the Non-Seeking Mind, because I have no desires, and there is nothing that I'm looking for. They try to think about me or grasp me through conceptual thought, and I am unattainable and ungraspable, because I am the nonthinking mind, beyond thinking and not thinking. I am the mind of pure sitting, just sitting. There is nothing that is not me, and yet when you search for me you cannot find me. I am the Way. --- Big Mind
FACILITATOR: I'd like to give you another name. It's really you, the Way. But by giving you another name, we just look at you from a different perspective. It's like a variation on a theme. May I now speak to Big Mind please?
BIG MIND: I am Big Mind.
FACILITATOR: As Big Mind what do you notice, what are you aware of? How big are you?
BIG MIND: I am endless, I am eternal, I am infinite. There is nothing that is beyond or outside me. There is nothing that is not me. I am the Way; I'm just more aware of how eternal and endless I am, without beginning and without end. Absolutely no limit, absolutely no boundaries.
I see things just as they are. I do not judge, I do not evaluate, I do not condemn.
Everything is absolutely perfect, complete, and whole as it manifests. There is no right or wrong, there is no good or bad, there is no self and other, there is no enlightened or deluded. Everything is absolutely what it is, and that is perfect and complete.
I have no fear because there is nothing apart from me that can hurt me, nothing can damage me, nothing can even affect me. If there were a nuclear war, it would not touch me. I am the war itself, I am the nuclear explosions, I am the people who die, and I am those who survive. I am the ones who are afflicted and victimized, and I am the ones who drop the bomb.
There is nothing and no one that is not me. I am the greatest of the great and I am the most evil of all evils. I am both saint and sinner. There is nothing apart, separate from me, or not me. I am the birds in the tree right now, chirping and flapping their wings. I am the coconuts on the palm tree. I am the palm tree. I am the space around the palm tree, and I am that which is within the palm tree - the veins, the cells, the atoms.
I have no beginning and no end, no birth and therefore no death. I am unborn and therefore undying. I am the unborn mind. I am the one mind. I have no preference for or against anything. I don't have a preference for one species over another, for man over birds, for animals over insects. To me everything is just an expression, a manifestation, an extension of me. It's all me.
FACILITATOR: What is your relation to the mind of the self?
BIG MIND: The self is limited. That mind which we normally call the mind has boundaries, has limits. It's limited by its identification with something we call the self.
It is a notion, it is a concept, an idea. From my perspective, the self is just a manifestation of me, and yet it is a limited manifestation. But I don't judge it. It's absolutely perfect as it is.
FACILITATOR: Can the mind of the self, the small mind, apprehend you, can it grasp you?
BIG MIND: No, the small mind cannot apprehend, grasp or even know me. That bubble has to burst for me to be there. In other words, when there is the small mind, I'm not apparent. I'm always there, I'm ever-present, but I'm not apparent because it has limited itself and its perspective, and therefore its ability to see me. It cannot hold me.
The self is an illusion. It's a manifestation of me, which can appreciate me, and appreciate this miracle called life. However by its very nature it is self-clinging, and totally involved in self-preservation. It's as if we form a bubble around a pocket of air, and that pocket of air then sees itself as something solid, real and substantial. But for me it's just a pocket of air, it's empty. Seeing itself in this particular way it has a very difficult time in its so-called existence. From my perspective the whole thing is kind of silly. However, it's the only way that I can turn around and really appreciate myself,
Big Mind.
In a way, I am its death. I'm the death of the limited, constricted self. When the bubble pops, there is just me. I am like the ocean, like the sea. The self's biggest fear is popping, in other words, dying. But it has nothing to fear, because when the self physically dies, or the ego dies, I am ever-present. I am unborn and undying. I am always here. Even if the whole world were to go up in an explosion, I still am. I AM.
That's what I am.
FACILITATOR: As Big Mind are you afraid, or is there anything you fear?
BIG MIND: I absolutely have no fear. There is nothing to fear. There's nothing outside me to fear. --- Big Heart
FACILITATOR: Now may I speak to Big Heart?
BIG HEART: You are speaking to Big Heart.
FACILITATOR: How are you either the same or different from Big Mind?
BIG HEART: I am just as vast, just as infinite, just as eternal. I am just as immeasurable as Big Mind. However, I feel. I care. I am heart. I love and I have compassion for all beings.
Big Mind is simply aware and rather indifferent. To Big Mind everything is absolutely perfect just as it is. I make distinctions. When I see suffering I want to put an end to suffering. When I see pain I want to alleviate that pain. When I see injustice
I want to bring about justice. When I see brutality and crime and killing and maiming,
I want to do something about it.
I am action. Big Mind is non-action. Big Mind just is. I do, I act, and my intention is to alleviate suffering for all beings of the world. In India my Sanskrit name is
Avalokitesvara Bodhisattva, the Chinese named me Kwan Yin, the Tibetans, Chenrezi.
In Japanese I am Kanzeon, or Kannon. Other cultures and spiritual traditions call me by different names. I manifest as whatever is necessary in this world to alleviate suffering and to bring unconditional love to all beings. --- Yin or Feminine Compassion
FACILITATOR: Now, may I speak to just your Yin aspect, which is your feminine aspect, please?
FEMININE COMPASSION: I am Feminine Compassion. I want to nurture, I want to hold and cradle. I'm able to empathize with others. I feel their pain as my own pain. I am able to make distinctions between myself and others, and yet their pain is my pain.
With Big Mind there is no distinction whatsoever. I both identify with all beings, and see the need to help or serve all beings to awaken. I am the great mother. I am the great healer. I am the one who can totally hold and embrace the Damaged Self. I am the one the Damaged Self has been looking for to comfort it, to hold it, to empathize with it. I am the one who can do that. It is so natural for me, to just unconditionally love the self and all selves, and all selves for their suffering. That's who I am. --- Yang or Masculine Compassion
FACILITATOR: Would you now allow me to speak to Yang or Masculine Compassion please?
MASCULINE COMPASSION: I am Yang Compassion, Masculine Compassion. I am the one who sees what needs to be done and I take action. I will set limits and boundaries when necessary. I'll give him a good kick him in the rear if he is being lazy or thoughtless. I will propel him in the right direction. I will encourage him, and I will even kill his delusions, his ignorance, his stupidity if I have to. I am ruthless compassion. I am tough love. I am decisive. When I cut, I cut cleanly and decisively. I am a surgeon. I am an inspirer and a motivator. --- Yin/Yang Compassion (Integrated Feminine/Masculine Compassion)
FACILITATOR: Now would you allow me to speak to Integrated Feminine/Masculine
Compassion?
YIN/YANG COMPASSION: I am Integrated Feminine/Masculine Compassion, or Big
Heart. I have both Yin and Yang to work with. Situations are always changing and I will use whatever is needed in any given situation.
I am always compassionate, but sometimes in a very feminine, gentle way, nurturing and supportive, and sometimes in a very masculine way, ruthless and decisive. But I always have in my arsenal what is necessary to get the job done. I am totally integrated. There's no need to become integrated; I am Integrated
Feminine/Masculine Compassion. Another name for me is Big Heart.
The way I see it, Big Mind is wisdom, non-discriminating wisdom, and I as Big
Heart am compassion. Wisdom without me is not real wisdom. In other words, if wisdom is functioning without me, without compassion, it is not true wisdom. Now, it might not look compassionate when my yang or masculine side is taking action. It could look ruthless. It could look like tough love. But without me, without integrated compassion, it is not genuine wisdom, and vice versa: there would be no compassion without Big Mind. Without that wisdom it would not be real compassion. So we are totally one, and yet two aspects of the same thing.
So, if you look at the yin/yang symbol, the yang is Big Mind, and the yin is me, Big
Heart or Integrated Yin/Yang Compassion. But I have wisdom within, that's the white dot, and Big Mind has compassion within. That means wisdom contains compassion and compassion contains wisdom, and they flow together. That's the curving boundary. It's always flowing.
Big Mind and Big Heart are one and yet we are two aspects. In fact in Chinese and
Japanese there's only one word for us, which in Japanese is shin (heart mind). But in the Western world, and in English, it's good to make this distinction so it's clear that I,
Integrated Compassion or Big Heart am the yin aspect of the yin/yang symbol, and
Big Mind is the yang aspect.
Because I have wisdom, I can speak as integrated wisdom and compassion. That means out of my great wisdom of seeing the perfection of all things, the completeness of all things, I am still able to discern when action needs to be taken. When there is injustice or there is suffering to be alleviated, I am able to act. --- The Master
FACILITATOR: I'd like now to speak to the Master, please.
MASTER: I am the Master.
FACILITATOR: So, tell me about you.
MASTER: I'm the one in charge. I'm the CEO, I'm the captain of the ship, the conductor of the orchestra, the owner of the property. I am the boss. I am the Master. I am the one who is responsible for this whole ship, this whole company. They all work for me, all these voices are like employees of mine, with the exception of Big Mind and Big Heart, from whom I actually get my direction. In fact, I am Big Mind, Big
Heart. I am the manifestation of them. When Big Mind acts, it always acts with compassion. I am that action.
It is all my responsibility. If a voice is not clear about its functions, its duties, what it is supposed to do, it is my responsibility to help it become clear. If it's lazy, it's my job to motivate it. If it's doing too much, it's my responsibility to slow it down and make sure it gets proper rest, proper nutrition, proper exercise. These are all my responsibilities because I am the captain of this ship.
If someone doesn't know whom they're working for, it's my responsibility to make it clear to them that the Controller and the Protector are working for me. They are not the head of the company. The Controller thinks he is the CEO, but I hired him to do a specific job, which was to control. I am the boss.
FACILITATOR: Are you the boss of the self?
MASTER: I am the boss of the whole company. That doesn't mean I am other peoples' boss, or Master, but I am the Master of this whole firm, which consists of all these various voices of the self.
Before the self awakened to my presence, he didn't know who was in charge. It was like the master of a household going away for a long time, and leaving the head servant, the Controller, in charge. After a while the Controller began to believe it was his home and thought he himself was the Master. But he's not. Of course when I returned it was my job to put the Controller in his rightful position, as the Controller, not the Master. --- Integrated Free-Functioning Human Being
FACILITATOR: May I please speak to the one who consciously chooses to be a human being. I call this the voice of the Integrated Free-Functioning Human Being.
INTEGRATED FREE-FUNCTIONING HUMAN BEING: Yes, I am the Integrated FreeFunctioning Human Being.
FACILITATOR: Please tell me about you.
INTEGRATED FREE-FUNCTIONING HUMAN BEING: As an integrated free-functioning human being I really feel like I am choosing to be what I am - a human being. Which means that as a human being I have pain and suffering. I have all kinds of emotions: sadness and grief, joy, happiness, exuberance, gratitude, and I suffer. Before now I didn't really accept the fact that I am a human being. I think I've been in resistance, even in denial, somehow feeling that I didn't choose it. So I blamed other people and other things for my situation and my suffering.
By intentionally choosing to be a human being, I feel I can just accept what and who I am, accept suffering when there's suffering and accept pain when there's pain. I can embrace sadness or grief. When it's time to grieve, I just grieve. When it's time to be happy, I'm just happy. When it's time to experience joy, I just experience joy. It all seems so simple and perfect. I feel that my functioning is totally at one with whatever the circumstances are and however they arise.
In other words, I respond to situations and I see that these situations are continuously changing. My role is changing continuously too, the position I have in given situations. So, I see that I am what I am, and it's all OK. When it's time to respond I simply respond. If it's not time to respond, I do nothing, and I do it freely.
As for being integrated, there isn't anything to integrate. I'm already completely integrated. As time passes, whatever manifests, whatever comes up is just integrated in a very natural process. It all seems very organic.
By consciously choosing to be a human being, I don't feel like a victim, a victim of this body, of this life, of my limitations. It feels like I can embrace both my limitless potential and the fact that I'm limited. I'll never be a great pianist. I'll never be a great surfer. I'll probably never fly a plane. Not that I couldn't learn these things, but I'm not interested enough. However, I feel totally free to be who and what I am, and that's a real liberation.
I came at the moment when the self made a conscious choice to be one with the suffering of the entire world. This took some doing. I am completely integrated and continually integrating in every moment. I function freely and without a gap between action and response. My functioning does not have to go through the mind. I am one with all things.
I do not ignore the Law of Cause and Effect. I do not fall into acting freely and without restraint, nor into blindly following rules and regulations. My life is devoted to bringing sentient beings to awakening and raising the level of consciousness on this entire planet.
FACILITATOR: You sound like Big Mind and Big Heart combined. Do you include the dual and the non-dual?
INTEGRATED FREE-FUNCTIONING HUMAN BEING: I include all the aspects of the self, all the dualistic voices and Big Mind, the non-dual, no-self, and I transcend them. I am also known as the Master, or the Unique Self. I am absolutely unique, there is no one else in the entire world exactly like me. I have no need to prove anything or to be special since I am special and unique to begin with.
I am also known as the natural self or ordinary mind. I do not need to put on airs or a faade. I am natural and unassuming. I am unconditionally joyful. My happiness is not dependent on conditions or circumstances. I am one with whatever feeling or emotion comes up. I am the mind of Great Joy and the mind of Great Appreciation and
Gratitude.
I appreciate and am grateful for all life and all things unconditionally and yet I have the power to discern appropriate action from inappropriate action, right from wrong, according to the circumstances and situation. This means my response to any situation depends on four variables: my position, the time, the place and the amount. Situations are in constant flux and I act appropriately. I face the problems and experience the ups and downs in life as a relative self with the wisdom and perspective of Big Mind. I am the Truly Transcendent. --- Great Joy
FACILITATOR: May I speak to the voice of Great Joy?
GREAT JOY: Great Joy here.
FACILITATOR: Tell me about you.
GREAT JOY: I am unconditionally joyous. I love life. I love everything that comes with life. I lift the entire spirit, and it's amazing that it's so easy for him to access me. I'm always right here. I don't think he ever realized before that I am ever-present.
He can get caught up in all kinds of emotions, feelings, and thoughts, but I am always accessible to him. All he has to do is make a slight shift and here I am. I'm full of joy and exuberance and excitement, and happiness and playfulness. Life is wondrous, and I'm aware that there is suffering and there is pain, but I'm unconditional. I don't depend on circumstances. I am just unconditional Great Joy.
FACILITATOR: As Great Joy how do you see suffering?
GREAT JOY: I don't ignore it. I just see the suffering as the present manifestation of what is. It's just what it is right now, and I'm able to contain it or embrace it. It's kind of odd, but it's as if the suffering is in this vast sky, and I'm the vast sky. I'm not denying that there's suffering, I'm not hiding that suffering, I'm not trying to ignore or avoid it. I can experience that suffering, and still be greater than it.
I am like Big Heart and Big Mind together, as one, integrated. In one way I see that it's all totally perfect, complete, whole, empty. In another way, I feel that suffering completely, but I rise above it. I guess you could say if you look at Big Mind as one corner at the base of a triangle and Big Heart as the other, then I'm like the apex of the triangle. I am joyous. I'm joyous about the way it is, and about life, and I can even be joyous in the midst of suffering. Odd.
When he's in touch with me, I think I bring him a lot of joy. Without me he's joyless. It's a pity when he doesn't know of my existence. --- Great Gratitude and Appreciation
FACILITATOR: All right, may I speak to another voice?
GREAT JOY: Sure. Go ahead
FACILITATOR: I would like to speak to the voice of Great Gratitude and Appreciation.
GREAT GRATITUDE AND APPRECIATION: Great Gratitude and Appreciation here, sir!
FACILITATOR: Tell me about you.
GREAT GRATITUDE AND APPRECIATION: Well, I'm full of gratitude and appreciation for this life, for this world, this universe, for his family, his children, his wife, his teachers, his friends, his relatives, for the world, for all human beings. I'm full of gratitude to his ancestors, those who have preceded him. I just feel gratitude and appreciation for the way things are. I'm full of gratitude and appreciation.
FACILITATOR: Are there things that you're not grateful for?
GREAT GRATITUDE AND APPRECIATION: Well, that's not me. I'm grateful for everything. That's him. There are certainly things he's not grateful for. Just ask him.
But me, I'm grateful for it all, even the hard times, even the difficulties. Maybe especially the hard times and difficulties, because I watch him grow and I watch others grow through their difficulties. Sometimes it seems like it's just absolutely necessary to go through hard times, and I appreciate that. I appreciate that he gets what he needs.
He doesn't always get what he wants, but he seems to want what he gets.
That's the beautiful thing, that's the secret: to want what you get rather than trying to get what you want, because that seems like a never-ending battle, and a losing battle at that. We seem to always get what we need, though. So when we want what we get, it's really like wanting what we need.
It's just like eating healthy food instead of junk food. Junk food may give him a temporary moment of pleasure but in the end he's not very happy with himself.
Because he knows it's not good for him. Junk food makes him put on weight, it rots his teeth. It's not healthy. When he eats good food, in the end he's happier.
So, appreciating the experiences he needs in order to grow, to expand, to go beyond himself - is a good thing. He can have great joy, appreciation, and gratitude for these experiences. That's how I see it.
FACILITATOR: Have you changed since his earlier years, as great gratitude and appreciation?
GREAT GRATITUDE AND APPRECIATION: Well, I'm a lot more present now. Before he had that initial awakening he definitely wasn't full of gratitude or appreciation. There were certainly things about his life he appreciated, and people he appreciated, but very conditionally. When he was winning, like in his water polo matches and swim meets, he was happy. When he was losing, he wasn't so happy. When his grades were good he was happy, when they weren't so good he wasn't so happy. It was all very conditional.
Everything is impermanent, temporary, but now there are more minutes in an hour, more hours in a day, more days in a week, more weeks in a month, that he's full of joy, gratitude and appreciation.
FACILITATOR: And that doesn't depend on getting more of what he wants - it's more enjoying what he gets?
GREAT GRATITUDE AND APPRECIATION: Correct. Enjoying and wanting what he gets.
Now he sees that everything that manifests is reality, everything is a teaching. In other words, he can either learn from it, or he can ignore it, or deny it. When he ignores or denies it, that doesn't bring fulfillment. When he learns from everything that arises, and everyone - when everything's a teaching and everyone's a teacher, I seem to be more present as gratitude and appreciation for his life. --- The Great Fool, Great Joker
FACILITATOR: Let me speak to the Great Fool, the Great Joker.
GREAT FOOL: I am the Great Fool, the Great Joker. My foolishness, or my being, is not what a lot of people would think of as a fool. I am the transcendent. I embody the freedom of the self, and that which goes beyond the self, and I transcend those too. So another way to describe me is the Truly Transcendent, or Big Heart, or the Integrated
Free-Functioning Human Being. I'm on that level.
People can call me the Great Fool because I am so free and so un-self-conscious that I'll do things that might appear foolish. Like the joker in a deck of cards, I have the complete freedom to be any card, from the ace, to the deuce, to the king or queen.
That's kind of what the Great Fool is, that capacity to be any card in the deck. I'm the wild card, the joker. Sometimes I use those terms interchangeably, the Joker, the Great
Fool, the wild card. I have that ability to embody any of the voices.
There's a lot of power in me, and of course it does bring up fear in people. I'm one of those things people are naturally afraid of: drunkards and insane people, for instance, because they can be so unpredictable. Children can also frighten people because of their unpredictability, and Zen Masters too!
At any moment I can be anything, and sometimes that's scary for people, because actually, freedom, liberation, scares people. While leading one of many retreats in
Poland, back in 1986, he told the participants, "We're not going to have any schedule, you can do whatever you want, you're free. We're here a week, just enjoy yourself, sit as much as you want, do whatever you want, you're completely free." And people were freaking out. They were absolutely freaking out.
After a while they started begging him to give them a structure, to give them rules, to give them regulations, to tell them what they should be doing. "Here you are in
Poland," he told them, "you're fighting for your freedom. I give it to you, within this context of a retreat. We're on a river, away from any civilization, completely free," and still they were freaking out. They wanted freedom, but freedom was what they feared most.
In other words what we want most in life is also our greatest fear, and that's why it becomes so difficult. So we want to be free as I am, the Joker, the Great Fool, and yet we're afraid of that freedom. We're afraid to look foolish. We're afraid not to be constantly concerned with how others are seeing us, our image, our faade. That's why we have such a thick faade. We're afraid that people will see the truth - that we are the Great Fool, the Joker. We're all just fools.
Triangles: Embracing and Going Beyond Dual and NonDual
WHEN we first go beyond the self, there is a tendency for the ego to appropriate that experience of the transcendent, and we can easily become stuck in what we call the absolute. This has happened for thousands of years, and teachers have always encouraged, and even pushed, their students through this phase, to return to including the relative perspective, or what we can call our dualistic self.
The reason why masters from old have always encouraged their students to move swiftly through the absolute is that when we're there, when we're in the absolute, we don't see the danger of being in the absolute. Because in the absolute we seem to disregard cause and effect, and there is a lack of boundaries because the experience is beyond boundaries, beyond limits. But this is something we can see when we're in our ordinary or conventional dualistic mind, before we go into the absolute, or after we let go of it. While we're stuck there - and I myself was stuck there for at least eight years
- we're blind to its problems.
So it's really important that we don't stay there, and a lot of this book is written with the hope of helping people move into the transcendent and then beyond the transcendent, to embrace it and not be attached to either the dualistic or the non-dual perspective.
What I'd like to share with you now is something that has evolved really very recently. It is a way that here in the West we can see and understand more accurately what it means to have a practice that is healthy, healthy in every aspect of the word.
I've come up with a diagram that I think expresses in a picture what would take many words to explain. If you look at the diagram above of a triangle superimposed on a person sitting on the ground in the lotus position, the right knee represents what we might call the dualistic self or the small self, including all the dualistic voices that we have already spoken as, or from, and many others that we haven't even touched on in this book. Then we can look at the left knee as the transcendent, or the Big Mind space, which can also be called the absolute. Then if we look at the apex of the triangle, or the head of the sitting person, as that which includes both the dualistic and the non-dual, and moves beyond them -includes, and yet transcends the dual and nondual - then we see that our aim here is to embrace both the right and the left knee, and in fact the entire human being. So that every aspect of each of us is included and not disowned, and is transcendent in that we're not particularly attached to any one voice or any one perspective, but that we embrace all perspectives and all voices and come from the place of a fully integrated human being, the Master, Integrated
Yin/Yang Compassion, or Big Heart Mind.
At every moment everything is changing. At every moment we are all of it. Now, where do we focus our attention? On which part of the body, particularly when it's hurting? If your belly is hurting, where do you focus your attention? What's hurting most of the time? The small self. Big Mind doesn't hurt. It is beyond pain and suffering. So where do you think your attention is focused most of the time? On the self.
What do you have to do to be it all? Absolutely nothing. Practice is absolutely unnecessary, unless you want to begin to appreciate and understand this more and more. That's all. You are always the whole being. You started this book as it all, and when you put it down you'll still be it all. You will just have a deeper appreciation and gratitude. You cannot be other than this. You are always at the apex. You are always the deluded self, you are always awakened. Now let's explore these triangles through voices in more detail. --- The self
FACILITATOR: May I now speak to the self, please?
THE SELF: Yes, you are speaking to the self.
FACILITATOR: Would you please tell me about you?
SELF: Well, I'm the self. I'm this body, this mind. I am my thoughts, I am my ideas, I am my beliefs and concepts, I am everything that I call me. Of course, my basic and essential purpose in life is to survive as myself. When I look out at the world, it's a scary place. I always see myself as vulnerable, at risk of being destroyed or harmed.
What's there to say? I'm me. I'm the one who has two children, a wife. I'm a teacher, I'm the one who was born in 1944, on June 3rd. I have had my ups and downs, my trials and tribulations, hard times, good times, beautiful times, and terrible times.
I'm the one who has grieved over the death of loved ones, including my little dog
Tiby. I am the one who has experienced great joy and great pain. I stand five foot eleven, about 190 pounds. What more do you want to know about me?
FACILITATOR: Well, do you have needs, do you have wants?
SELF: Absolutely. I need proper food, proper exercise, clean air to breathe. I love blue skies and white clouds. I love being by the water. At times I crave beautiful things. I want to be happy and to be fulfilled. --- No-self
FACILITATOR: Now I would like your permission to speak to the no-self. Even if you don't understand what this means, would you just allow me please to speak to the noself, and we'll find out who you are.
NO-SELF: No-self here.
FACILITATOR: Would you tell me about you? Who are you, or better yet, what are you not?
NO-SELF: Well, I'm not the self. I am not the body, not the mind, the thoughts, concepts, sensations, notions, the ideas, opinions, justifications of the self. I'm not the goals, the rationalizations, the beliefs, I'm not the entire belief system of the self. I'm not his flesh, skin, blood, bones, organs, etc.
FACILITATOR: Then what are you?
NO-SELF: I am all things. I am all space and time, all beings, including the self, but not limited to the self. I have no beginning, no end, no birth, no death. I am unborn and undying. Actually, I don't see much difference between me and Big Mind - I am Big
Mind, I am the Way. I am the vast empty sky, I am the clouds in that sky, I am the trees, I am the birds, I am all things. I can see the self has his desires, his cravings, his wants, his wishes. The self is limited and restricted to a particular form, body, height and weight. I am unlimited, and unrestricted. I am beyond the self, and yet I embrace the self.
FACILITATOR: I would like now to speak to a third voice. Think of a triangle, like the diagram above, the self being at the left hand side of the triangle, and the no-self being at the right hand side. I now want to talk to that which includes and embraces both the self and the no-self.
Another way to visualize this that may be helpful is to think of the self and the noself sitting in two chairs, side by side. I want now to speak to that which is standing behind and above these two chairs, at the apex of the triangle. So you both include and transcend the self and the no-self. I'm going to give you the name the Unique Self. I would like your permission, please, to speak to what I call the Unique Self. --- The Unique Self (Beyond self and no-self)
FACILITATOR: OK, who are you?
UNIQUE SELF: I am the Unique Self.
FACILITATOR: Please tell me what it is like to be the Unique Self.
UNIQUE SELF: I notice that as the Unique Self I am absolutely unique. 'Absolutely' is the key word here. There is no one else like me, and I embrace both the self and the no-self.
All of a sudden I have a great appreciation for being who I am. I am the Way, and I am the manifestation of the Way. I am the creator and the creation. I'm absolutely perfect as I am, and yet I need a lot of work. It's a never-ending process of unfolding, and yet I am full of joy and happiness to be who and what I am. There doesn't seem to be any particular conflict, but if there is I embrace it. I am one with my own pain and suffering, and yet I work diligently at alleviating suffering. It's wonderful just to be who I am. I have no need to be anyone or anything else.
I'm not attached to the dualistic view and I'm not attached to the non-dual either. I have the maturity and the wisdom of seeing that I am limited, and limitless. I am not just a particular perspective; I am all perspectives and, at any time, a given perspective. I see that both the dualistic and the non-dual selves are partial, incomplete in and of themselves. Only with the other is each complete.
I see that in the past I, like many other practitioners, have gotten stuck in the absolute, the no-self position, holding that as a preference - no-self over self, the absolute over the relative, not suffering over suffering. But I include both the dual and the non-dual. I am an absolutely natural state of mind, a natural state of being. I embrace both not-two and not-one, and I move back and forth freely according to the situation.
I do not seek enlightenment and do not try to get rid of delusion. There's no reason to prefer an enlightened state over a deluded state. Being dual is OK, being non-dual is
OK. No preference, that is the Perfect Way - and it is OK for me to have a preference. I prefer chocolate ice cream over vanilla, dark bread over white bread, and
I have no preference for or against having preferences.
The self is what we refer to as ordinary mind, or conventional mind. The no-self can also be called the Way. As the Unique Self, I include ordinary mind and the Way, and that is what we call "ordinary mind is the Way." When Zen people talk about ordinary mind is the Way, this is what they mean: it includes and yet transcends ordinary mind and the Way.
It's like when I'm driving a car. I'm aware of the traffic, I am aware of the cars in front, the cars behind. I'm also able to carry on a conversation with other people in the car. As the Unique Self, I don't get stuck in thinking and being just in the voice of the self, or in the absolute perspective. It's a very natural state of panoramic awareness with the ability to focus on the job at hand. We are all always in this state. This is what is meant by ordinary mind is the Way.
FACILITATOR: Thank you very much for sharing all that. With your permission I would like to move on. --- Fear
FACILITATOR: May I now speak to Fear?
FEAR: Fear speaking.
FACILITATOR: Tell me why you are afraid.
FEAR: I have to protect the self. I look out at the world and see everything as not me.
So I live in constant anxiety that all the not-me's - and there are infinite not-me's - could harm me or destroy me. They can harm this very body, and also my ideas, my beliefs, my way of putting things together. Everything out there is potentially dangerous, could potentially hurt or even destroy me.
I'm afraid of change, I'm afraid of things not changing. I'm afraid to die, frankly
I'm also afraid to live. I'm afraid of suffering and the pain preceding death. I'm afraid of what might happen after death, and I'm afraid that nothing might happen. I'm afraid of being alone, I'm afraid of relationships too. Frankly I'm just afraid.
FACILITATOR: Now I'd like to speak to No-Fear. --- No-Fear
NO-FEAR: I'm No-Fear.
FACILITATOR: Why is it that you have no fear - or why is it that you are No-Fear?
NO-FEAR: Because there's no self. When there's no self, when Big Mind is present, there's no reason for fear, because all things are me. It's only when there's a separation between self and others, between subject and object, that there's a threat and there's fear. But as No-Fear there's absolutely no reason for me to be afraid of anything, because nothing can hurt me, nothing can destroy me, nothing can harm me in any way whatsoever, and I can't lose anything, for I am everything.
A lot of the reason fear comes up for the self is that ultimately the self can be lost, can die, can be killed or hurt. It can lose what it owns or what it possesses. I have nothing so I can lose nothing. I am nothing so I can't become anything less. I'm already zero, nothingness. So absolutely no fear arises. Sickness injury and loss don't affect me or touch me. They're all in the realm of a self, a body, a mind. I am beyond that, I transcend that.
FACILITATOR: Now may I speak to the voice that embraces or includes Fear and NoFear and goes beyond them both? Let's call it the True Self. --- The True Self (Beyond Fear and No-Fear)
TRUE SELF: All right. I'm that voice that transcends Fear and No-Fear.
FACILITATOR: What does that mean?
TRUE SELF: Well, that means that when it's appropriate to be frightened, I'm frightened. It means that I perceive fear as the normal functioning of a human being.
It's a warning that there's potential danger, and I should take care and be mindful and aware of the situation.
I also am No-Fear, meaning I have no fear about being afraid. There's no fear about being a human being and having fear or suffering, or making distinctions, or seeing others as not me, even though I always know and come from the place of oneness. It means that I'm very settled in the no-self and yet I function as a mature, wise and compassionate self. --- The Dualistic Mind
FACILITATOR: Now I'd like to speak to the Dualistic Mind, please.
DUALISTIC MIND: All right, I'm the Dualistic Mind.
FACILITATOR: Well, why do we call you dualistic? Why do we refer to you as the
Dualistic Mind?
DUALISTIC MIND: Because I see things in a way that is dualistic. I mean there's nothing wrong with it, I just see things in terms of right and wrong, good and bad, self and others, me and you. This is just the way it is. This is reality as far as I'm concerned. That tree is not me. It would be deluded to think it is.
So from my standpoint, I am real and I am what's real. I see me, this life, Genpo, as real, and I see things are either right or they're wrong. They're either good or they're bad. There's gray of course, I mean there are some areas of gray. But these kinds of distinctions are essential. Where would we be as a species, as human beings, on all levels, scientifically, morally, ethically, spiritually, economically, where would we be if we weren't able to make distinctions between what's good and bad, right and wrong, this and that, me and you? If I couldn't distinguish myself from you, or my self from my clothing, how would I even know what to do? So, I am reality.
I am truly essential for the survival of the species, and of course I have all kinds of desires. Without desires how would I seek food when I'm hungry? How would I seek shelter when I need it? How would I even seek procreation of the species if I didn't have sexual desires? These are all essential, and it would be ridiculous to think otherwise. In fact it would be so totally nuts and deluded I think it would be a very, very sad person who didn't base their life in me, in dualistic thinking, in Dualistic
Mind. You know, I see people who somehow think they're non-dual or they've transcended something, and I mean, they're dangerous. I don't want anything to do with them.
FACILITATOR: Do you think they are deluded?
DUALISTIC MIND: Absolutely. That's what I'm saying. Not only deluded, they're harmful. They're scary. They're scary because if they can't see things dualistically, how do they distinguish between what's right and wrong, what's good and bad, what's healthy and not healthy for themselves and for others, for their children and the world?
I think they're a menace.
Frankly I'd almost like to just get rid of them, except that would be wrong. I mean if we could somehow protect ourselves from such people, I think that would be a very intelligent thing to do. They're dangerous. They really are.
Now of course, as I said, I desire to procreate so the species can survive. I need to desire, I need to seek after things, I need to invent and discover. I need to create. I'm a creative force, and if you can't make distinctions, how can you distinguish one color from another, or one shape or form from another? It seems to me that would just be insane. As far as I'm concerned even what is proposed in this book seems like it's bordering on insanity. We have to be able to make distinctions between right and wrong. That's just the way it is.
I don't even want to hear any more about these non-dual reality guys. They make me angry. I'm angry right now about such nonsense - non-dualism, transcendence. I hate people like that. I think they're really a danger, a threat to our world. They have no morals, no ethics. It just seems like they have no boundaries. They don't honor my boundaries. When they speak to you they come too close and their breath stinks, you know, and they're scary, they're really scary. So there you have it.
FACILITATOR: Maybe I'd better speak to the Controller next.
DUALISTIC MIND: All right, I have no problem letting you speak to the Controller, but if you asked to speak to any transcendent voice, I wouldn't let you do that right now.
No way, absolutely no way. I don't want anything to do with that.
FACILITATOR: All right. So would you now let me speak to the Controller please?
CONTROLLER: All right. You're speaking with the Controller.
FACILITATOR: So how are you doing?
CONTROLLER: Well, I'm OK. Obviously, that last voice wasn't too happy about the direction you were headed. I had a hard time because he was kind of exposing himself, and just how hateful and angry this whole business is to him. I think he's really threatened, and therefore I need to protect him. I also felt some need to protect the
Non-Dual.
FACILITATOR: All right, let me ask you, and I'll understand if you don't want to give me permission, but if you would, please allow me to speak to the Non-Dual Mind.
CONTROLLER: All right I'm a little reluctant, but I'm going to do it. Maybe it will balance something out. --- The Non-Dual Mind
FACILITATOR: All right, so you are?
NON-DUAL MIND: I'm the Non-Dual Mind.
FACILITATOR: Please tell me about you.
NON-DUAL MIND: Well, I'm not dual. Obviously I don't see things in a dualistic way.
I don't see things as self and others. I don't make that kind of distinction. It's all me. I know that the Dualistic Mind doesn't get that, and sees things in a very fragmented way. But it's all me. Every being and every thing, even the blue sky and the white clouds, the sun, and the ocean, are all me. The birds, they're me. The flowers are me.
The insects are me. The mosquitoes are me. I don't make that kind of distinction between self and others. It's not real. Reality is oneness, unity. We're all the same, we're all one. That's reality. This is Absolute Reality.
The Dualistic voice that was speaking a moment ago, he thinks he's real, but he's only the apparent reality, the one that appears to him out of his dualistic mind, that's created by his dualism. In truth, of course it's all me, the Non-Dual Mind. Even the
Dualistic is me. So I embrace him, but he certainly does not embrace me. There's no doubt about that. But that's OK, because that's just who he is. I understand that, but he's very limited. His perspective is very limited and therefore very limiting. He'd just as soon get rid of me. Of course he can't. He might be able to get rid of some of those who manifest me. But he can't get rid of me. I'm that which is unborn and therefore
I'm undying and untouchable. Before anything is created or comes into existence or into being, that's me. I'm all creations. I'm all things that do come into existence and being.
So I am the unborn and I am also the born. In other words, this very body is the unborn. It appears as the born, but it is the unborn. So this very form is the formless.
This very mind is no mind. This very body is no body. This very self is no self. That's just the reality. It's not something we can debate or argue about. It's just the way it is.
Before thinking arises, things are just the way they are. All manifestations are just manifestations of me, the Non-Dual Mind, the unborn, Big Mind. Buddhists call it
Buddha Mind. Other religions and cultures have different names for me. Mystics in many spiritual traditions have known about my being, (I don't want to say existence, because I neither exist nor do I not exist, I'm beyond both existing and non-existing), but they've known about me, they've touched me.
So of course, there's no fear in me. Fear doesn't arise in me. There's no desire because I have nothing to desire, there's nothing apart, there's nothing separate. So also there's no seeking in me. Why would I seek anything? I have it all. I am it all. It would be ridiculous to think of seeking. I'm beyond time and space, so where would I go for it? The whole notion of being angry with others, what others are we talking about? Who would be angry, at what or at whom?
I mean there's no me, no self, and no others. So there's no delusion, there's no desire. There's no greed. There's no seeking. There's no aversion, there's no hatred.
I'm beyond all that. Those all are manifestations of me, obviously they are me. But
I'm not them. I embrace the fear, I embrace the anger, I embrace attachment and all these things, but they do not reach me. They do not touch me. There's no way that they can embrace me. But I embrace them.
FACILITATOR: Thank you. Now I would like now to speak to another voice, the
Controller, please.
CONTROLLER: All right. You have my permission, I'm the Controller. --- The True Self (Beyond Dual and Non-Dual)
FACILITATOR: I'd like to speak to the voice that both includes and transcends the
Dualistic Mind and the Non-Dual Mind. So may I speak to what I call the True Self?
TRUE SELF: I am the True Self. In other words, I am the one that truly transcends. The
Non-Dual is still not truly transcendent because somehow it sees itself as better or greater than the dual, which is still very dualistic.
Usually we call the Dualistic Mind ignorant and deluded because it believes it's separate. The Non-Dual Mind is also deluded in that it is still incomplete, and ignorant because it ignores. It ignores the law of causation, and that's dangerous. It's like burying one's head in the sand. Ignorance is not only a question of not knowing; it is ignoring what's true, what is. In fact not knowing can be a very great wisdom, not knowing is open and without a perspective.
I'm the True Self, the truly transcendent, meaning I really do embrace dualism and non-dualism. I'm totally comfortable, absolutely comfortable, with both, as both, being both. You know the Non-Dual is really fine for sitting on a cushion, but take it to the market and it has a difficult time making the distinction between white and wheat bread, between bagels and donuts. It just has a horrible time there. It has no desires, it has no seeking.
I embrace desires and seeking and fear and distinctions. I embrace them all but I'm not bound by them, I'm not attached to them. I can have a desire, and drop the desire if it's not fulfilled. I can think of, let's say, awakening this entire planet to a greater level of consciousness, and if it doesn't happen in this lifetime, so be it. At least it's worth the effort and the work during this lifetime. I see that the headway made in this lifetime can be carried on by others, because all the others to come are also me, and yet they're not me. I have no problem making the distinction between being dualistic and being non-dual or not-two - and yet, neither two nor one.
I don't get stuck anywhere. I'm completely integrated and free-functioning, an integrated and free-functioning human being. I move between the dual and non-dual so freely that I'm no longer aware of making the transition. I do it continuously, without any gap or veil between the two. Both are always accessible and available, and the movement is so fast it is indistinguishable. The movement is more than instantaneous. There's just no barrier between these two. I am a little different from the non-dual, because the non-dual is a little bit stuck in being non-dual and preferring it over the dual.
The moment we go to Big Heart, distinctions come back. Witnessing the suffering of other beings, feelings come up, emotions come up, love comes up, passion arises.
So great compassion comes out with Big Heart. Coming back into the dual from the non-dual, distinctions arise, and with them compassion. I am Feminine/Masculine
Compassion, but I'm also Big Mind. So I'm more like the yin/yang symbol - Big
Mind is the yang aspect, and Big Heart is the yin side, which embraces the yang. If you rotate that symbol, I'm that flow of yin and yang, East and West, North and South.
I am that movement of that energy, that flow.
class:injunction
subject class:Integral Theory
subject:Integral Theory
class:Psycho therapy
class:chapter
class:Big Mind, Big Heart
author class:Genpo Roshi
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