classes ::: Agenda Vol 06, The Mother, Satprem, Integral Yoga, chapter,
children :::
branches :::
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bookmarks: Instances - Definitions - Quotes - Chapters - Wordnet - Webgen


object:1965-04-23
book class:Agenda Vol 06
author class:The Mother
author class:Satprem
subject class:Integral Yoga
class:chapter


1965 Fri 23 April
April 23, 1965

Every night now, almost without exception, I spend a part of the night in someone else, who seems to be meits me, but the circumstances are completely different, the relationships are completely different. And last night, I dont know how (oh, it was a long story), I saw myself: I was wearing a sari and my hair was loose, and it was white! It was white with some black streaks that had remained black; and suddenly I saw my face in a mirror, and thats how I knew it was someone else.

And it seems to be quite a daily occupation, a very regular occupation, with people totally different from one another, totally different, but all of them in contact with Sri Aurobindos thought or Sri Aurobindos Work. Some I know very well, with people around them whom I know very well; some others I dont know so well.

The previous night, it was difficult because I was (I waswho was I? I dont know) harassed and attacked by someone who didnt want to leave me alone and whom I found totally repugnant, who was to me an embodiment of falsehood and hypocrisy. It was a symbolic being (the whole thing was symbolic) and he represented something, almost like one of the human vices, something symbolic and very widespread, and what a nuisance it was, oh! I called on everything to get rid of it. But I didnt find out who I wasit was me, but outwardly I dont know.

But last night, as it happened, in the course of all the circumstances, I was with someone whom I know very well (not materially) and I had white hair, and that person told me, Oh, its very fine, just go ahead like that. Then I saw my face. I had a pale face, but not white, and white hair falling onto the neck, very white (the white of black hair), with a few black tresses in itwhite hair. And I said, But no! When one has white hair (I dont know what language I was speaking because one doesnt hear any sounds, one understands inwardly) white hair like this isnt pretty. So (laughing) when I came back to my usual state, I thought, Oh, but what a strange face I had!

Its a little tiring. Every time theres a new difficulty to be overcome, a problem to be solved, something to be set in order.
***


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OBJECT INSTANCES [0] - TOPICS - AUTHORS - BOOKS - CHAPTERS - CLASSES - SEE ALSO - SIMILAR TITLES

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1965-04-23

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1965-04-23

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