I had X told about a rather interesting encounter of mine with Ganapati1 (quite a few years ago), and how he had promised to give me whatever I needed and actually gave it for quite a long time, certainly more than ten years, and generously so. Then everything changed in the Ashram. It was after the war, the children came and we spilled over; we became much more complex, much larger, and began to be in touch with foreign countries, particularly America. And I continued to be in contact with Ganapati; I cant say I used to do a puja to him (!), but every morning I would put a flower in front of his image. Then one morning I asked him, Why have you stopped doing what you had been doing for such a long time? I listened, and he clearly replied, Your need has grown too large. I didnt quite understand, because he has at his disposal fortunes larger than what I needed. But then, some time afterwards, I had this told to X, who answered me from the height of his punditism, Let her not be concerned with the gods, I will look after that! It was needlessly insolent. Then I turned to Ganapati and asked him, What does all that mean? And I clearly saw (it wasnt he who answered, it was Sri Aurobindo), I clearly saw that Ganapati has power only over those who have faith in him, which means its limited to India, while I needed money from America, France, England, Africa and that he has no power there, so he couldnt help. It became very clear, I was at peace, I understood: Very well, he did his best, thats all. And its true that I keep receiving from India, though not sufficiently; especially as since Independence half of India has been ruined, and all those who used to give me a lot of money no longer do, because they no longer canit isnt that they no longer want to, but that they no longer can.
For instance, M. was greatly interested in my story about Ganapati, and I saw that there was a connection between him and Ganapati, so I told him, But turn to him and he will give you the right inspiration. And since then M. has been perfect, really; all that he can do he does to the utmost of his ability. So all this is very good.
But there is a considerable difference between the real fact, that is, what this body [Mothers body] represents, and Xs conception. He has always remained all the way down. This is what, in fact, had ruined his health for a time. And the odd thing is that every time he was ill and CONSENTED to inform me, he was instantly curedhe KNOWS this, but still his first instinct is always to turn to the gods with his ordinary puja.
It was the same thing with you I saw that. He regards you like this (gesture of looking down on Satprem), and then, youre not a pundit (!), you havent had the religious education of the countryhe regards you as a beginner, he isnt at all conscious of where your mind is, of where your mind can reach. I told him, but even that he doesnt quite understand. But once, I saw (it was at the time when I was giving him meditations downstairs), he had made a remark that was quite preposterous on the fact that people here meditated with eyes closed and that I, too, had my eyes closed when I meditated. It was reported to me. That was long ago, years ago. He was going to come and see me the next morning, so I said, Wait, my friend, Ill show you! And the next day, I meditated with my eyes open (Mother laughs)the poor man! When he went downstairs, he said, Mother meditated with her eyes open, she was like a lion!
Thats it, you understand, theres a gap.
He is a very good man, but very ignorantit seems funny to say that about a pundit, a great pundit who knows Sanskrit better than the head of the Maths [monasteries] of the South, but I say that he lacks this: the opening up above. He has a connection in a straight line (gesture tapering off to a point above), and indeed its very high up, but its a pinpointa sharp point that gives him an experience which is his ALONE: he cannot pass it on to others. You understand, it isnt an immensity rising upward: its a pinpoint.
Last time, when he came to meditate, just before he came upstairs, all of a sudden I felt the Lord coming (He has a particular way of becoming concrete when He wants me to do something), and He became concrete with the will that I should take advantage of this mans goodwill to widen his consciousness. It was very clear. And He became concrete with a Power, you know, one of those overwhelming Powers and a wonderful Love. It came like that, and he was caught in the Movementwhat he was conscious of, I cannot say. But when he left the room, he said he had had an experience. And this time, he was quite sincere, spontaneous, natural, not trying to to make a show.2 It was very good.
No, you might have gained something [with X], but its a something you would have found quite small; if you had felt it, you would have thought, Oh, really, that was it!?
(silence)
But he has given W a new mantraa mantra to Kali, with the sound of Kali! Yet W isnt on Kalis side,3 not in the least! Its things of this sort that I dont understand in X. Whereas I know so well the kind of force, the quality of power that not only influences but can be manifested by one person or another, here or there. X seems to do it according to tradition: you must first turn to this divinity, then to that one, then regardless of the individuals quality. He doesnt seem to have a very great psychological insight into individuals.
When I sent him D. (you know, she is always ready to believe in any miraculous power), she went to him in good faith. He made outwardly every blunder that was needed to make her withdraw! So she withdrew.
Anyway, it doesnt matter.
Now, lets hope you will
But still, for years now he has been making me go round in circles. Will I eventually get hold of a little something?
But of course, its traditional, mon petit! Thats the way of tradition: you must always have people go round in concentric circles, and there are times when you must drive them FAR AWAY to increase their aspiration. Thats what tradition is all about I dont believe in it.
Its erudition, thats how its passed down from guru to chela [disciple], indefinitely.
Now when I see a possibility in someonebang! I fling it at him sometimes it stuns him a bit! But at any rate, one goes faster.
He thinks I act the way I do because I am incompetent.
(Satprem laughs in disbelief)
No, I am not imagining things: I know! He said that thing (had Sri Aurobindo been here, he would have had a good laugh!), Oh, the gods, she should let me look after them, I know better than she does! You understand, when I was giving meditations in the hall downstairs, they were all thereadd: Shiva, Krishna, all the gods of the Indian pantheon were there, seated like this (gesture in a circle) to follow the meditation.
Krishna sometimes I walked with him for hours in conversation. At night, when I was very tired from my work, he would come and sit on the edge of my bed, I would put my head on his shoulder and fall asleep. And it lasted for years and years and years, you knownot just once by chance.
After that, I smiled.
Which Aspect or Force is most in affinity with what I am?
Ahh!
Have you read The Mother?
Its the first aspect.
Do you have the book? I saw the text not very long ago and I thought, Well, this is exactly it!
(Mother looks for the book)
But I gave you your name because There are many people who are very, very different apparently and are in relation with very different aspects of the Mother, yet who all, for a reason which I know, will find the fullness of their being only when, Truth having been fulfilled on earth, divine Love will be able to manifest purely thats why I called you Satprem. And there are other people, whom I know very well, who appear to be at the other end (how can I put it?) of the realization of their character (they are entirely different in origin, entirely different in influence), and yet who have exactly the same character with regard to something else, which I will tell only when the time comes. And its only when divine Love can manifest in its absoluteness that they will have the fullness of their being. So that for the moment they have, like you, but for very different reasons, the feeling that things dont move, nothing gets done, nothing changes you know, that all your efforts are useless; or else, for a few who do not have a sufficiently developed higher mind, they dont have faith: they think, Oh, its all promises, but (vague gesture, up above).
You are saved from that difficulty by the fact that up above you understand fully. But thats very rareyou should be infinitely grateful! (Mother laughs)
Oh, but I AM grateful!
(Mother leafs through The Mother by Sri Aurobindo, then reads:)
Here:
Imperial Maheshwari is seated in the wideness above the thinking mind and will and sublimates and greatens them into wisdom and largeness or floods with a splendour beyond them. For she is the mighty and wise One who opens us to the supramental infinities and the cosmic vastness, to the grandeur of the supreme Light, to a treasure-house of miraculous knowledge, to the4
There isnt enough light for me.
But there was a sentence there that suited you marvelously.
(Mother reads again further on:)
Equal, patient and unalterable in her will she deals with men according to their nature and with things and happenings according to their Force and the truth that is in them. Partiality she has none, but she follows the decrees of the Supreme and some she raises up and some she casts down or puts away from her into the darkness. To the wise she gives a greater and more luminous wisdom
You should read all this passage. I am looking for that sentence.
Youll tire your eyes.
(Mother reads further on:)
Yet has she more than any other the heart of the universal Mother. For her compassion is endless
I cant see I am imagining more than seeing.
Youre tiring your eyes, leave it.
(Mother reads on:)
is endless and inexhaustible; all are to her eyes her children and portions of the One, even the Asura and Rakshasa and Pisacha and those that are revolted and hostile. Even her rejections are only a postponement, even her punishments are a grace.
All this passage. I am sorry, my eyes have become When theres plenty of light I can see very well.
Youre getting tired.
Yes.
But anyway, She is the one.
I simply found a sentence and I thought, This is just right for Satprem. You understand, I feel it, I know those things, because I feel which Force or Power is actingwhen I am with one person or another, there is always something that is the witness and watches the play of Forces, and it is this observation that lets me know. If I am asked, Who is it?I know because of this.
***
ADDENDUM
(Extract from The Mother by Sri Aurobindo5)
Imperial MAHESHWARI is seated in the wideness above the thinking mind and will and sublimates and greatens them into wisdom and largeness or floods with a splendour beyond them. For she is the mighty and wise One who opens us to the supramental infinities and the cosmic vastness, to the grandeur of the supreme Light, to a treasure-house of miraculous knowledge, to the measureless movement of the Mothers eternal forces. Tranquil is she and wonderful, great and calm for ever. Nothing can move her because all wisdom is in her; nothing is hidden from her that she chooses to know; she comprehends all things and all beings and their nature and what moves them and the law of the world and its times and how all was and is and must be. A strength is in her that meets everything and masters and none can prevail in the end against her vast intangible wisdom and high tranquil power. Equal, patient and unalterable in her will she deals with men according to their nature and with things and happenings according to their Force and the truth that is in them. Partiality she has none, but she follows the decrees of the Supreme and some she raises up and some she casts down or puts away from her into the darkness. To the wise she gives a greater and more luminous wisdom; those that have vision she admits to her counsels; on the hostile she imposes the consequence of their hostility; the ignorant and foolish she leads according to their blindness. In each man she answers and handles the different elements of his nature according to their need and their urge and the return they call for, puts on them the required pressure or leaves them to their cherished liberty to prosper in the ways of the Ignorance or to perish. For she is above all, bound by nothing, attached to nothing in the universe. Yet has she more than any other the heart of the universal Mother. For her compassion is endless and inexhaustible; all are to her eyes her children and portions of the One, even the Asura and Rakshasa and Pisacha6 and those that are revolted and hostile. Even her rejections are only a postponement, even her punishments are a grace. But her compassion does not blind her wisdom or turn her action from the course decreed; for the Truth of things is her one concern, knowledge her centre of power and to build our soul and our nature into the divine Truth her mission and her labour.
Ganapati, or Ganesh: the son of the supreme Mother, god of material knowledge and wealth. He is represented with an elephant's head.
Italics indicate words or sentences spoken by Mother in English.
There are four aspects or "sides" of the universal Mother: Maheshwari (the supreme Mother), Mahakali (the warrior aspect and the aspect of love), Mahalakshmi (the aspect of harmony and beauty), and Mahasaraswati (perfection in the arts and in work).
We give the complete passage in Addendum.
Cent. Ed., XXV. 26 ff.
Asura, Rakshasa: demons of the mental and vital planes; Pisacha: depraved beings.
***
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